askin for too much.

sooo yeaaaaa, this past weekend was valentines day weekend.

now as mentioned in previous blogs i liked this nigga ... 

there was that whole debate and all this OTHER bullshxt.

was he talkin to someone?

was he NOT talkin to someone??

did he like me ... did he not.

welp, i got to chill w/him.

right after the DevaSTatingly Naaasty Yardshow&&Party, (goodstuff)

i was with him AAALL valentines day morning.

fell asleep in his arms, WHOOOOLE NINE.

 ... only for him to tell me the next day

"i just want to be friends"

now i've heard this before ...

its the story of my damn life.

i'm the friend

will always be THEE friend

b/c im "cool" or im such a "nigga" that i can hang.

soooo once again i ask why the FXCK am i so damn INVISIBLE.

why am i still the friend.

in explaining it to my friend i was told

"well bianca you expect too much"

i guess in some respects i do.

so i'm sorry that i expect dudes to be honest.

let their actions speak louder then their words.

PERHAPS,if you just wanted to be friends maaaaybe you shouldn't have pursued  me as if you WANTED  a relationship.

PERHAPS, not tell me that you like me.

if you wanted to be friends, approach me like a friend.

&&certainly don't wait for me to ASK you want you to give me a damn answer.

sooo, ONCE again the situation has turned back around on ME,

become my fault.

ALL BECAUSE i ask for too much.

hmmp.

bee*

=[

soooo,

can someone tell me why this hurts sooo bad???

it doesn't even make sense.

there is no relationship or anything.

but dang i REALLY liked this dude.

&&findind out that e likes someone else&&is talking to someone else hurts like a

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

bee*

my color has officially changed to gray.

soooo, theres this guy ...

alright ...

sooo, yeaaaa ... you guessed it. i've moved on to a NEW guy.

my patience wears thin when things aren't progressing to anything.

so anywhoooots ...

theres this guy ...

&&it's trippin me out because this ain't even a crush anymore yo.

this is full on LIKE.

i just think everything about this guy is unbelievably  cool.

i like the fact he has a _____ and it ACTUALLY works for him&&doesn't look insanely stupid.

the way he talks, its like borderline awkward ... but not @ the same time.

i like how i notice he's smart, not in an obnox. way , but in an attractive way.

i like how he's just him, no questions asked.

heheee. =].

i sooooo need to make him my valentine, =]

feelin like a school girl again ... 

all giddy&&shit.

i can't even add colors&&other misc. shit to this blog.

its THAT serious.

 ... aint this shit a BEEEE.

bee*

i feel all bright&&happy like the color yellow. =]

this post has been altered to protect me